back to the past
I ran into an old friend tonight. I was working and it turns out she now works with an organization that I come in frequent contact with, so I looked up and there she was. We had a falling out about 6 years (or more) ago and I never did stop thinking about her. I went to her house a little over a year ago to finally apologize and tell her how much I missed her and a stranger answered her door. She had apparently moved to Colorado about a year before.
I thought we were never going to be able to reconnect and that I was always going to have to live with that. I was ashamed of myself for not going to her sooner. When I saw her, my automatic reaction was to hug her, as if no time had passed and I was humbled when she hugged me back.
I keep wondering what the lesson in this is. The one that keeps coming to mind is that it is never too late, until it is. Luckily, I had the opportunity to tell Beth I was sorry, that I missed her and thank her for everything she had been to me.
This circumstance brings to mind several other relationships that could use mending. Am I going to wait 6 or more years mend them? I think the thing that holds me back the most is mistrust in my own emotions. Are they making these old relationships a bigger deal than what they ever really were? Or, does it really even matter.
I know that with Beth, I honestly thought I was never going to see her again and when I did, there was no thinking to it. The reaction was sincere and automatic and turmed out to be the right thing.
Maybe the bigger lesson is to just trust life and be open to all its opportunities, especially when it offers the chance to apologize and forgive.
